top of page
r8obbgcr.jpg

She was generous with her time and love, I remember that she’d bring food from her granny’s she would share it with me and remark on my ability to handle spice.. On birthdays, she was genuinely happy to take those trips to Walmart to pick up our classic laRocca cakes for our lab members/friends. She breathed life and light into the room and in our lives. I genuinely thought that if I ever started a business Meruba would be the first person I’d spend all my money recruiting once she was done with all her schooling. In the back of my mind I held a bit of hope that maybe we’d come together again in the future to become teammates again. The realization that this won’t happen hurts me deeply, but I can find peace knowing that Meruba is at peace and that I will carry pieces of her generosity, kindness, thoughtfulness and phenomenal work ethic into the future with me. I am so grateful to have known her and to have created a lifetime of memories with her in a short time. From being a tireless advocate for change, fostering dogs, tutoring, mentoring others, creating opportunities for students, producing impactful contributions to research and countless other initiatives - she was a force to be reckoned with and the world has lost a ray of light and will never be the same.

I am so sorry, I can only imagine the pain you are going through after losing Meruba. I hope you find some peace knowing that she lives on in our memories.

 

Lots of love,

 

Navi

Dear Sivaani and family,

Meruba is one of the most intelligent, genuinely kind, funny and is absolutely the most real person I’ve ever known. I was lucky enough to work closely with her for 3 years , to be a part of her journey and to call her a friend. She would love to poke fun at my lack of organizational skills and I would absolutely love to roast her for her inability to calculate the concentration for drug injections. I loved our conversations, i loved the memes she’d create about our day to day interactions. She would always make me laugh so hard with her savage comments and jabs. Best of all is when she’d make jokes at Sana’s expense... Jokes aside, I was constantly inspired by her creative thoughts, deep provoking conversations (does time even exist?) and her unwavering stance on social issues at every level. Every project Meruba embarked upon she gave it her ALL and consistently made an impact everywhere she went. She was someone who stuck by her commitments through thick and thin. In those early days, when our results were good we’d take the evening to celebrate like we did something groundbreaking and when an experiment failed miserably we’d go get Thai express and sit around and mope together. I loved those moments and the memories will stay with me forever. 

Sivaani & Family,

I can't even begin to understand what it must feel like to lose such a special person. And that was what Meruba was -- so special. I'm grateful to have worked with and have known such a kind and genuine human. I know she was a light to many people and I'm so sad that the world will now be less bright without her. Sending so much love in this hard time.

Love,

 

Vassilia

Lab Photo.jpg

Dear Sivaani and family,

I'm so sorry for your loss. I will always remember Meruba as one of the smartest, most well-spoken people I've ever met. Every time we spoke, I was astounded by how incredibly witty she was. I knew I certainly wasn't that witty when I was younger, and I haven't met anyone as pithy, yet. She always told things how they were, and found a way to inject her personal sense of humour into serious situations. I remember once we were having a heart-to-heart in the office when someone said something funny in our group chat.

I responded in the group with laughter, but Meruba, sitting right across from me in person saw that my facial expression hadn't changed and totally called me out on it. Then she changed my icon to the neutral face emoji on her phone, and we laughed about it every time we saw each other after. It's the little things like that which reflected her unique sense of humour, and that gave our conversations so much character.

She was incredibly level-headed, which made her a great go-to person when trying to sort out a problem or navigate a difficult situation. I truly think the world needs more people like her, and it makes this loss all the more difficult. Sivaani, you are an amazing big sister. I remember how you always had each other's backs and supported each other. You always had her best interests at heart. The first few times I met her she was introduced as "Sivaani's little sister" but man, she could really hold her own, and I think we all learned that quickly. You had such different personalities, but such an unbreakable bond, nonetheless, and I know you'll always carry that bond with you.

Sending you all the love in the world,

 

Mary

Dear Sivaani and family,

I'm so sorry to hear about Meruba's passing. Meruba, you were one of the first friends I made in the lab and I feel lucky that I got to witness even a small portion of your growth, from a tiny high school student into an accomplished and beautiful young woman. When I think of you, I think of a hyper-intelligent person who always had something witty to say at the right moment. You were so authentic that no one could ever question the integrity of your actions, and your laugh was so genuine that it always made me feel like I had accomplished something major by eliciting it. I also have such a vivid visual of you with your Jansport backpack, from all the times I saw you carrying it to the lab for cell counting or to the office for La Rocca birthday cakes. Beyond all of that, your kindness also stands out in my memory. When I was dealing with the loss of a friend who also chose to take her own life, you were patient, understanding, and supportive. When my dog passed away, you were one of the few people who texted me to extend your condolences. Thank you for your kindness; you were a real one. (You could also be such a savage but in the most hilarious and humbling way.) I have no doubt you would've made a great lawyer or a great anything. I respect that you made a decision that was best for you, but I also think the world is truly worse off without you. I'm so sorry you were suffering and I hope you have found the peace you deserve.

Sivaani, to say I considered you and Meruba a package deal would be an understatement. You both stand out as individuals with distinct personalities, but I always admired how fiercely you stood up for her and advocated for her to be included in whatever you did. I have never witnessed anything like the bond you two had, and I don't think that can ever really go away. She was lucky to have you as her akka.

Sending you a big hug. Love,

 

Claire

Lab .jpg

Dear Sivaani and family,

I am absolutely devastated! Meruba was one of the brightest, most passionate and genuine students that worked in the lab. She officially joined the lab one year after I started at UTM; I say officially because she often kept Sivaani company during some late nights (and weekends) in the lab. Meruba was so super witty, something that I got to experience during lab parties where she'd often direct a few one-liners my way. I have so many fond memories of her, from the "Martini" awards given out during our first lab BBQ, to her fantastic thesis presentation, to the back-and-forth banter we'd have whenever she'd ask for a reference letter. She would always ask, "Will you write me a STRONG letter of recommendation," to which I'd often reply, "Isn't it cheating by asking for a STRONG letter?" But my favourite memory has to be when she was accepted into Law School.

She stopped by my office to let me know and was beaming. We talked for a bit about how her passion for research drove her to pursue law school. She told me (and I can hear her words reverberating as though it were yesterday), "I feel that going through law school will put me in a better position to advocate for changes in our systems based on empirical evidence. Research will always be an academic interest of mine and I plan on staying involved in it throughout the rest of my career in any way possible." That was such a Meruba thing to say. I was so proud of her and will always be grateful for the time that I knew her.

 

She was a shining star, and I am genuinely sorry for your loss.

 

With love,

Loren

My warmest condolences to Sivaani and her family. It is deeply saddening to hear of Meruba's passing.

She was a smart and friendly student who always seemed to strive towards her goals...

My thoughts and prayers with you,

 

Chulmin Cho

PHOTO-2021-02-22-11-28-38.jpg

அமைதியாக இருப்பது மிருபாவின் சுபாபம் என்று

நாம் நம்பி அமைதியாக இருந்துவிட்டோம்.

அமைதிக்குள் ஓர் எரிமலை உண்டென்று

உனைஅழித்தவுடன் விழிபிதுங்கி நிற்கின்றோம்.

ஓயாதபடிப்பு உனைசெதுக்கும் என்று நம்பினோம்.

உனைஅழிக்கும் என நினைத்திருந்தால்

அந்தகாலனையே வென்றிருப்போம்.

பட்டப்படிப்பை விட பட்டறிவே வாழப்போதுமானதென  உலகுக்குணர்திட்டாய்.

ஈழப்போரில் எம்மினம் கொத்துக்கொத்தாய்

அழிந்தது.

அந்த உயிர்பிழைக்கவந்தநாட்டில்

உயிர்விடுதல் எந்தவகையில் நியாயம்!

பாறைபிளந்து பயிர்செய்யும் இனம் எம்மினம் அல்லவா!

அந்த இனம் புலம்பெயர்தேசத்தில் தற்கொலை எனும்பெயரில் அழிவது நியாயமா?

 

 

கடவுள் தந்த உயிரை நீங்களே பறிக்க உங்களுக்கென்ன உரிமை?

புலம்பெயர் இளம்வித்துக்களே கொஞ்சம்

கேளுங்கள்!

உங்கள் அம்மா,அப்பா உடுப்பு பொதியுடன்

இங்கு வந்து சிறுகச்சேர்த்து பெருக வாழ்பவர்.

உங்களை வளர்க்க அவர்களின் இரத்தத்தை

வியர்வையாக ஊற்றியுள்ளனர்.

கேட்பதெல்லாம் கிடைக்கிறதென்றால்..

அவர்கள் ஓயாது உழைப்பதனால்தான்..

உங்கள் மனக்கவளைகளை குடும்பத்துடனோ

நெருங்கியவர்களுடனோ பகிந்துகொள்ளுங்கள்.

உங்கள் பெற்றோர் உடுத்த உடுப்போடு வந்து

இங்கு வசதியோடு வாழும்போது

இங்கு பிறந்து வளர்ந்தவர்கள்

உங்களால் ஏன் முடியாது.

எந்தமுடிவானாலும் பெற்றவரோடு பகிருங்கள்.

இந்த மிருபா கடைசியாக இருக்கட்டும் தற்கொலைக்கு!

தற்கொலை எனும் பெயரையே அக்கினி இட்டு

எரித்திடவேணும்.

புலம்பெயர்தேசத்துமாணவர்கள் நினைத்தால் முடியும்.

உங்களுக்குள்ளேயே இந்தநோயாளிகள் இருப்பார்கள்.

அவர்களை கண்டுபிடித்து ஆற்றுப்படுத்துங்கள்

எங்களால் முடிந்த உயிர்களை காப்போம் காத்துநிற்போம்.💐

 

- Anjana Murali

In Loving Memory of Meruba Sivaselvachandran (1997 - 2021)

bottom of page